MMA Archive

Couture sends Coleman into retirement

By
Tim
Published: February 7, 2010Tags: , ,
Couture sends Coleman into retirement

I’m terrible at picking fight winners, usually playing it safe with “it could go either way” so I’m assured of being right. This one I had all the way. I suppose I should have declared it before Randy Couture beat Mark Coleman at UFC 109, but you’ll have to take my word for it.

The first ever UFC heavyweight champ has had three god-awful fights in his return to the octagon, and I’m including his one win, and I’ve been waiting for the day I wouldn’t have to watch him anymore. His latest loss will make that happen. But I have to say Coleman made me a fan with his quote of the night:

“#*&@ you, Tito. Any #*&@ing time, Tito. Anytime, douchebag.”

Absolute highlight of his comeback. Post fight, Ortiz talked some trash because that’s what he does best, and we were given that beautiful quote straight into the mic. Other than that, Coleman’s had nothing to offer. Couture beat him with his boxing, pushed him up against the cage, eventually took him down and choked him out in the second round. I believe Coleman landed one punch.

Lesnar heals himself to hurt others

By
Tim
Published: January 20, 2010Tags:
Lesnar heals himself to hurt others

“Talk all the shit you want now, diverticulitis!”

Finally speaking for himself, UFC heavyweight champion Brock Lesnar revealed that he has healed his diverticulitis without surgery, and hopes to resume hurting others. Who is the f-ing man, indeed. Lesnar avoided a surgery that would have had him using a colostomy bag and ended his career, and instead got better with a high dosage of antibiotics and healthier eating.

I imagine it’s a bit awkward to be the doctor who recommended the former. Or perhaps he was only trying to protect us all from Lesnar’s wrath. Regardless, Lesnar went from having a hole in his stomach to nothing.

“[The doctors] were dumbfounded,” Lesnar said. “They couldn’t find any signs of any problem in my stomach. It’s just a miracle to me. I actually had to go back to the doctor yesterday before I came out here and get another CT scan, because I just still can’t believe it.”

Lesnar hasn’t fought since July of 2009 after canceling a November fight, but now expects to defend his belt this summer against the winner of the Frank Mir – Shane Carwin bout. It’s great to have him healthy, and as much as I dislike the guy, it’s great to have him back in the UFC. Going down to an illness or injury is never the way anyone wants to see a fighter get beat.

Now that his stomach is healed, I can root for his leg to get broken in good conscience.

Lessons in manliness

By
Tim
Published: August 12, 2009Tags:

With Forrest Griffin coming off his (and maybe anyone’s) most embarrassing loss ever, it’s the perfect time to review his new book, “Got Fight?: The 50 Zen Principles of Hand-to-Face Combat.” The title alone, not to mention the author, will tell you this book is aimed to entertain. If that weren’t enough, alternative titles are mentioned in the publisher’s note, including Griffin’s favorite, “Who Moved My Nose?”

“Got Fight?” is no literary masterpiece, despite Griffin’s own Hemingway comparison on the back, and he’s far from a zen master. But he does manage to give some good fight tips and even a motivational lesson or two that readers can benefit from. Wisdom can be gained after looking past his dumb redneck persona. The book’s first anecdote is of a pocket-protector-wearing nerd who Griffin called the “toughest dude on the planet,” and it was because of his attitude. He got beat up and thrown down numerous times by a few tough guys, but kept coming back for more until the bully attackers ran off. As the fight began, the nerd had proclaimed, “I’M READY TO DIE!”

“Toughness can carry you a long way, especially in fighting. Personally, I don’t have the best strikes or submissions in the business. The reason I’ve won most of my fights is that I’m too stupid to back down.”

“When you take incredible abuse and refuse to make the switch to flight mode, it causes your opponent to doubt that you have the lever in your head at all. At that point, you start to appear more like an angry wild animal than a human. And the majority of us fear angry wild animals because they have no reason. I would have no problem scrapping with a bear or a baboon if I knew that once I hurt it or it hurt me, we’d both say, ‘Okay, that’s enough, time to call it quits and go home.’ But that’s not what angry wild animals do. They don’t get into fights; they get into scraps that go to the finish. And once you’re lying dead in the dirt, they take it one step further by tearing off your genitals and eating them. When up against this type of opponent, you don’t see the battle as a sport – you see it as a struggle to remain alive, and a lot of fighters aren’t prepared for that. It breaks them mentally.”

Forrest chronicles some of his fights, from his first ever small time show, in which his opponent broke his tibia and was literally tossed out the back to lie near the trash cans rather than treated by a medical professional, to his UFC Light Heavyweight championship win over Quinton “Rampage” Jackson and subsequent loss to Rashad Evans. Fight tips range from striking and submission techniques to bacterial and fungal infections to watch out for in grappling practice. Forrest reminds readers that in a street fight, groin shots are not only legal, but encouraged. You may also want to spar and train drunk, so that if you’re in a bar fight you’ll be prepared. Even nutrition gets covered briefly.

“Just like you wouldn’t put shit in the gas tank of your car, don’t put shit into your body. If you want to perform at your best, put high-octane fuel into your system. (Yes, that analogy was very, very lame.) Knowing what foods to base your diet on doesn’t take a brain surgeon – clean meats and loads of fruits and vegetables. However, I do not follow this in the least. I can get away with this because I have different genetics than you. My body works best when fueled by cookies, ice cream, and blue cotton candy. I’m like an elf.”

Some of the comedy can be juvenile and repetitive. The reader can only be called a douche bag so many times before it gets old. Other parts show the natural humor that Griffin has shown in numerous interviews. The book ends appropriately with a section on super secret techniques, including how to defend a dog attack with a special choke, how to defend against a sword attack, making sure you stick out your tongue after breaking a man’s neck to impress chicks, knees to the nut sac (again, only for street fighting), the eye gouge, the hockey beat-down, and a dirty little move called “the asian dart.”

“Got Fight?” isn’t for everyone. In fact, it begins with a Cosmo-style “Manliness” quiz to weed out those unworthy to read on. You’ll learn some things about training physically, mentally, and what it takes to be a fighter, but this is for people who think Forrest is a cool dude and want to hang out with him for a while.

Griffin embarrasses himself in UFC 101

By
Zuri
Published: August 9, 2009Tags: , ,

Anderson Silva embarrassed Forrest Griffin in UFC 101. Griffin ran out of the octagon with his tail between his legs.

Anderson Silva embarrassed Forrest Griffin in UFC 101. Griffin ran out of the octagon with his tail between his legs.

If you don’t get knocked out in UFC, or are forced to tap out for fear of a broken limb, there’s no reason you should be quitting because of punch to the face.

On Saturday, Forrest Griffin was absolutely embarrassed by Anderson Silva after the light heavyweight practically rope-a-doped him into a solid-right strike to the face. Silva had been gaming Griffin, who looked visibly scared after his first early knockdown in UFC 101. And Griffin didn’t want any part of the beatdown that was going to ensue, throwing up his hand after his second knockdown before running out of the octagon with his tail between his legs.

First thing I yelled after he quit the fight: “What a wussy!!!” And then a myriad of other expletives.

Here’s a rule mixed martial artists: Don’t quit, unless you have to. In this fight, it was more than obvious Griffin didn’t have to quit. He was just being a wussy. Or, even worse, a coward.

Overall, good knockout though by Silva. It was thoroughly enjoyable. It proves he’s one of the smartest fighters in the game right now. And that hard right, makes me think that lean body has more punch than I expected. Apparently, Griffin was scared of a second encounter.

Wussy.

ESPN still not paying attention to MMA

By
Zuri
Published: July 1, 2009Tags:

I’m curious to see how much time and space ESPN and ESPN.com will dedicate to next weekend’s UFC 100. It’s just a number, after all, but ESPN loves to make a big deal out of those nice round numbers. And why not? It is a milestone and is being presented as such, with two titles on the line and a stacked card.

I’m curious because I’ve heard ESPN voices say several times that they failed to give the sport, in particular the UFC, the coverage it deserved. They didn’t predict it’s rising popularity. Fair enough. Most didn’t. But I haven’t seen too much of a change in coverage. Little time is dedicated to the sport on TV, and ESPN.com hides it on a back page, which gets its content primarily from Sherdog.com.

Horse racing, I would imagine, is not a sport on the rise. Yet today there is a horse racing headline on ESPN’s home page. I won’t bore you with the headline. We all know what the story says.

“Some horse ran faster than some other horse. The slower horse was shot in the head.”

I don’t really have anything against horse racing. It’s fun to watch a big race, or a small race that you have big money riding on, and the horses are impressive athletes. I just want ESPN to up their game a bit. There’s no avoiding ESPN if you’re a sports fan. It would be nice to not have to look past them all the time to hear about MMA. The sports nation needs to have high standards for the sports leaders.

Guida exposes flaws in UFC scoring

By
Tim
Published: June 24, 2009Tags:
Clayton Guida (white trunks) vs. Justin James

I can’t say I’ve ever seen Clay Guida hurt anyone in a fight. His fans will tell you he’s one of the most exciting, intense and active fighters in the game, but six of his nine UFC fights (5-4) have gone to decision. The most exciting are the ones he’s losing. Guida is the best example of a new breed of fighter, content to do nothing more than control the octagon to earn a decision. Unfortunately, this approach has earned wins for him and others.

At The Ultimate Fighter 9 finale Saturday night, Guida lost to Diego Sanchez by split decision, which he should have. What surprised me was that one judge somehow scored the fight a win for him. Sanchez dominated Guida in round one with a flurry of uppercuts and a kick to the face (credit to Guida for an amazing chin as he popped right back up).

Guida (nicknamed “The Human Seat Belt” by a friend of mine) most certainly won the second round according to the judges, and that’s where the problem comes in. He got the takedown he always looks for, and did nothing but keep Diego down for most of the round, with little to no damage done. Sanchez used the opportunity to bust open Guida’s head with vicious elbows, and had a couple submission attempts. To me, that round is scored a win for Diego. A takedown counts for something, but this is a fight after all. This isn’t “ground and pound,” but a strategy some are calling “lay and pray.” As in, lay on top of the guy and pray for a decision. UFC judges seem all too content to reward those rounds to the fighter on top, regardless of what happens in that position.

Guida’s previous fight boiled down to holding Nate Diaz around the waist and pinning him up against the cage. That was enough for the decision win. It didn’t matter that Guida didn’t take advantage of this position to do damage, or that he didn’t advance this position. It didn’t matter that Diaz was still landing more shots and threw Guida to the ground several times from this bear hug. Guida maintained a dominant position for most of the fight, and the decision in his favor said that that’s what matters to the judges.

Octagon control is a necessary judging tool that has to be factored into a decision, but not as the most important aspect of a fight. It’s being weighted much too heavily. This is more of a tiebreaker. The UFC and president Dana White should realize that allowing fighters to win this way will encourage others to follow suit, because the bottom line is winning. He should also realize that this makes for boring fights that will turn off fans. The UFC made its name off delivering the goods and having fights live up to their potential, not with hugging contests. This trend needs to end.

Entering the era of Machida

By
Tim
Published: May 24, 2009Tags: , ,

Joe Rogan said it best: “Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Machida era. We have just entered a new era in the light heavyweight division.”

Lyoto Machida is a ninja. If he vanished and reappeared on the other side of the cage, I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised. Machida became the new light heavyweight champ in the UFC Saturday night with a knockout over previously unbeaten Rashad Evans. He’s now 15-0, as well as unmarked, unscarred, unbruised, undamaged and un-a lot of other things. I’ve never seen opponents swing and miss on so many punches and kicks.

What’s even more impressive is that I think Evans did better than anyone else I’ve seen Machida fight. He landed a couple punches after a flurry by Machida, and a couple kicks to the body and leg. He was rocked in the first round, but recovered. He was rocked by several shots in the second and even seemed to talk trash in the process before finally going to sleep. He even did a good job of getting Machida to come to him early in round one.

But there’s still no fighter that has figured out how to attack the karate black belt. He’s patient, avoids all strikes, and doesn’t need many of his own to inflict damage. Evans never came close. As big a Machida fan as I’ve become, and as much as I want to see him hold the title for years, I’m also extremely curious to see what that successful game plan looks like. I can’t imagine.

Anderson Silva – Forrest Griffin set for UFC 101

By
Zuri
Published: April 29, 2009Tags: ,

After Anderson Silva’s disappointing decision win over Thales Leites, the second straight “boring” fight for the middleweight champion, UFC President Dana White said he would have a hard time convincing fans that his next fight would be any different.

There have been two problems with creating matchups for Silva, and White has solved both of them. First, it’s hard to think of anyone in his weight class that is a legitimate threat rather than someone with a “puncher’s chance.” Secondly, with Silva preferring to counter, his last two opponents seemed unwilling to put themselves in harm’s way, leading to boos for a boring fight. At UFC 101 in August, Silva will face light heavyweight Forrest Griffin, and things will be different.

It’s the perfect matchup. Griffin has never been in a boring fight. His are among the most exciting in the sport, and he’s not at his best until his face is bleeding. Excitement problem solved. But as a former champion, he’s also a worthy opponent. Silva’s previous jump up to light heavyweight was a quick knockout over middle-of-the-road James Irvin. Not sure he proved anything we didn’t already know in that fight.

White won’t have any trouble selling this event, which includes B.J. Penn vs. Kenny Florian for the lightweight championship. Fans may be frustrated with Silva, but they know what to expect with Griffin. Oh yes, there will be blood.

Greasegate II – Anderson Silva

By
Zuri
Published: April 20, 2009Tags:

Somehow I missed this on fight night, but Anderson Silva is the second champion to be accused of greasing. Georges St. Pierre was greased in his second fight against B.J. Penn by his trainer, although the impact it had on the fight and the intent was debatable. Both seem pretty clear this time.

Silva and Thales Leites could have fought in a vaseline pool Saturday night and it wouldn’t have affected the outcome. It’s the intent that is the real problem. Silva can be seen rubbing his face and moving some of that vaseline to his chest, stomach and arms.

While it’s disturbing to see him so obviously greasing, I’m much more disturbed by his performance in his last two fights. Is it possible some of that grease dripped onto the floor, and Leites was slipping to the ground instead of intentionally falling? Probably not, but that’s the excuse I think he should use. I’d love to hear him use this as an excuse like B.J. did. Then I’d like the guy a little more for making me laugh.

UPDATE: Silva’s manager Ed Soares said the greasing charges were “ridiculous,” but offered a fairly ridiculous excuse.

“How much Vaseline can they put on someone’s eyebrows that’s going to make a difference?” Soares said. “Where’s he going to wipe it? If he wasn’t wiping it on his shorts, where would he wipe it? It wasn’t like he was rubbing it in. He just took it off. We didn’t put it on. It was [the cutman] that put it on.”

Excuse me then, he wasn’t greasing, he was just wiping off the vaseline … on his chest and arms. What choice did he have? There was too much on his face. Soares also defended Silva’s performance in the fight, which has come under criticism.

“He did everything that people questioned he could do,” he said. “When it went to the ground, Thales Leites couldn’t pass his guard. The question if he could go five rounds? He went five rounds without breaking a sweat for 25 minutes. What else does the guy have to do? Is the only thing they want to see is knockouts? Then, put fighters against [Silva] that will stand and bang with him, not guys that will fall on their backs.”

I agree with the last part, but I don’t know if going five rounds without breaking a sweat is something to be proud of.

Silva disappoints again at UFC 97

By
Zuri
Published: April 19, 2009Tags:

Dana White can not be happy. In building up the UFC as its president, White said he learned a lot from boxing on what not to do. Too many times, he’s said in interviews, viewers paid $60 for a boxing event, then turned off the TV at the end of the night and said, “Damn. They did it to me again. They didn’t fight.” That’s exactly what happened at UFC 97 in Montreal.

The supposed pound-for-pound king Anderson Silva was coming off a crowd-displeasing win over Patrick Cote in 2008 in which there was very little fighting before Cote blew out a knee in round three. At least someone got hurt in that fight. His UFC 97 fight against Thales Leites was worse – five full championship rounds of patty-cake.

“I personally apologize for what happened tonight,” White said. “You guys know this is not what the UFC was built on. This is not the way fights usually go.”

“I’m personally unhappy with the whole fight. I did not like the fight at all, period, on either side.”

Credit to White for maintaining his brutal honesty even when it puts his business in a bad light. And he’s right, both fighters were to blame. Leites’ game plan, apparently, was to draw Silva in close and then fall onto his back, hoping to draw the champion down with him. Silva instead chose to stare at his opponent, kick his leg, then put his hands on his hips and walk away.

I can understand not wanting to go to the ground with an opponent who could beat you there, but Silva should have backed up sooner if he wanted Leites on his feet, rather than wasting 10 to 15 seconds deciding which leg to kick. And Leites should have realized his falling over strategy wasn’t working (and was truly pathetic). At some point in a fight, an attack needs to be launched, and neither fighter did that. Leites won round two with a take-down, while Silva won three or four rounds by throwing a leg kick or leg punch (yes) every 15 seconds or so. Quite simply, they didn’t fight.

The Canadian crowd, booing for much of the 25 minutes, broke out into two chants of G-S-P for their hometown hero, welterweight champ Georges St. Pierre, and one chant of BULL-SHIT. An embarrassed White wasn’t smiling when he put the championship belt around Silva’s waist.


“We run a fight company, and when guys don’t fight, we sit down (with them) and have a conversation on why they’re not fighting,” White said. “This is what I do. It’s like having any other business and the guy doesn’t come out and perform at work.”

“I’m in the business of selling fights, and I think I’m pretty good at it. But I’m going to have a hard time letting people know that, ‘I promise, his next one is going to be good.’ I need to talk to him and figure out what’s going on and why this is happening.”

Silva said afterward that he was unable to finish Leites, I say he never tried. Silva said he showed he was in good shape and could go five rounds, I say I could’ve lasted those five rounds and I’m in terrible shape.

“I don’t know if it’s that people don’t understand my style of fighting, but I go out there to train to try and be efficient and have a perfect fight,” Silva said through his manager and interpreter, Ed Soares, at the conference. “Not every fight is going to be a knockout, and not every fight is going to be some spectacular finish.”

White said that Silva is still the pound-for-pound best, I say it’s St. Pierre. Why is it a given that Silva is the best? Their skills are comparable, but Silva has now gone 7 1/2 rounds without fighting. GSP has never done that.

In the co-main event, Chuck Liddell received more cheers in another knockout loss to Mauricio “Shogun” Rua than Silva did in his win. Liddell may have lost, but he came to fight and put it all on the line. This fight was almost identical to the Rashad Evans loss. Liddell looked good, although a step slower at almost 40 years old, and was narrowly winning the fight before suffering his third knockout in the four recent losses.

He’s taken too much punishment, and no longer has the chin to hang with the best anymore. I was rooting for Chuck to begin his comeback tour, but even I’m hoping for retirement this time. As of today, I have him as the best light heavyweight fighter of all time.

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